For Vincent by Deborah Landers
Blinded by the brightness of the night
I watch the wind carry it over the sleeping town,
Watch it rain down like a shower of gold,
Bathing the world in light.
The moon claims its corner of the sky
Fighting the stars for prominence.
Light against light—
an eternal struggle which has no clear victor—
Trapped in the pain and the joy
colored in the starry sky.
Darkness twists like a welcome intruder
Cutting in on the celestial dance.
An immovable object—
Jagged across my thoughts—
Giving in to the invisible music
Of the altered mind.
I will live in the chaos
Of a million brushstrokes,
Borrowing their colors from the universe
To press in at my unprotected eyes.
I will commit to falling in love with a moment,
To losing myself in motive stillness,
To giving in to the broken starlight.
Your shattered heart can't understand
That love is meant to be received
As much as you generously give it away,
And I can't show you the scars I have
From trying to gather its shards together.
I cannot reach across the years between us
To undo what was said and done to you.
I can only see your ghost
Haunting me from picture frames,
Planting a garden of sunflowers in my soul
That I might find light
Where you could not.